My gay family keeps it real for me; they don’t sugar coat anything. You can never be sure what we’re gonna end up talking about ‘cause there is no line they won’t cross. We talk about everything under the sun – no matter how down and dirty it might get. That’s why its so great to have them in my life – cause I know I can ask them about ANYTHING and I will always get the flat-out truth.

Especially with my gay mother, Tasha, who I met at The Attic a few years back. I honestly don’t know where I’d be today without her. I can go to her for advice about anything. Any questions I have, she is right there to answer. That was the good thing for me – to be around people like her and the other guys at the Attic. No matter what time of the day it is, you’ll hear something about safer sex. No matter if we’re in a group or just talking, that always comes up somehow. That was definitely something I needed to hear about, a few times over and over. It makes it easier to think about once you can talk out in the open like that.

Of course I was already having sex a long time before I‘d even heard of The Attic…before I even knew what a condom was. And that was – oh wow – I was young as hell…11 maybe? Yeah, 11.

I remember this one time in particular. My mom was on vacation for the weekend and I guess I felt like I had a little freedom and I could do whatever the hell I wanted. I had a bunch of friends over to the house. And there was this one guy, Khalil, who I had been watching for awhile and something just told me he had to be gay. I remember we were just smokin’ and chillin’ for awhile and then people started leaving. So, it was just me and Khalil, watching a movie until one thing led to another. You know, unprotected sex and stuff.

I guess because nobody was there and Mom was gone so I figured that nobody would ever know. That’s basically how it used to be for me – just experimenting with guys here and there, whenever I got the chance. Nothing was ever planned in advance. It always seemed to happen that way – it was always like first we would smoke and then…well…you fill in the blanks. But it was never like I started out thinking “OK, me and this guy are gonna smoke a blunt and then have sex.” Things just happened naturally, so I was never ready to go with the condoms or anything.

But Tasha wasn’t havin’ that. It’s not like she’s on my back all the time…she just explains things to me and then I can make my own decision. I mean, I remember one of our first conversations and, at that point, I didn’t even know what an STD was. I felt really stupid. She talked to me a lot about HIV and safer sex and she told me to get tested so I did. It came back negative, which was a relief. I guess I’m one of the lucky ones that messed around but didn’t get burned.

So now, I make sure to have a condom on me no matter what, because you just never know what might happen. I always grab a couple of those condom/lube packets everytime I’m in The Attic, so basically, they are all over the place. A couple in my bag…some in my room…they’re everywhere. At this point, my friends are coming to ME for condoms, cause they know I’ll have them.

But don’t get the wrong idea about me – I’m not an angel or anything. I mean, I still have my slip-ups here and there – it’s not like I use a condom with every single guy, every single time. It’s kinda crazy to think I’m carrying these condoms everywhere I go and then I’m still not using them 100% of the time. But it just happens sometimes – especially if we’ve been smoking real heavy cause then, it’ll sort of slip my mind.

‘Course, Tasha hates when I say that. She says you have to take care of yourself – every time it happens. She just keeps saying over and over “No glove, no love”. Sometimes, it gets on my nerves but I know she’s right.

I chose my gay family and I love them all. I would never want anything to happen to them, especially Tasha. Like she says — “The gay family goes on forever”. I know she is just looking out for me too.

Besides, I want to be around for a long time – to get a little older and maybe help out the next group of gay kids coming up. So I gotta make sure I take care of myself. I gotta do more with those condoms then just carry them back and forth. I gotta stop playing games because now I’ve got people counting on me…and that’s for real.