BOYFRIEND UNIVERSITY: Distancer Pursuer Style of Relating

How many of us took Boyfriend 101 in school? I bet the number is low. (Drunken, late nights experimenting with other boys don’t count). We plan for our education and prepare for our careers, yet when it comes to relationships some of us give more conscious thought to buying a new pair of jeans. I often meet men who say they want a relationship and yet have few skills and limited awareness about how to create it. It seems many of us gay men know little about emotional exchange, vulnerable disclosure, or power struggles. If we want good relationships, then we have to ask ourselves, what is healthy relating and how do we nurture it in our lives?

Where to meet lesbians?

I’m in the process of coming out as lesbian and need some help. I’m in my early thirties and have never even approached being involved in the gay scene. I started to realize my orientation a few years ago, but was very traditional-minded and never thought I would be able to live any other way. But it’s important to me that I not waste any more time and begin living the life I want.  I found stuff online about how to come out to your friends and family and while the conversations have not always been easy, I feel good about being able to be honest.  What remains for me is finding lesbian and gay friends and learning how to approach women. I don’t know any gay people my age in my social network, other than a couple acquaintances. How do I go to a lesbian bar and meet people?

Grammy Mame, Stylez Milez, and I had the chance to try Barbuzzo during restaurant week.

The power lesbians of 13th Street (Valerie and Marcie) who also own Lolita, Grocery, Bindi, Open House, Verde, and Marcie Blaine Chocolates debuted their latest home run – BARBUZZO! Honestly, these women have the Midas touch! One might be tempted to call them overachievers. Personally, I think they passed that when they opened their 4th business on 13th Street! I think after a 7th business we need to admit, they’re on a quest to rule the world, or at the very least the gayborhood!

Hipster Hunting: Surprising Local Spots to Meet that Boy You’ve Been Stalking on OKCupid

I met most of my best friends on OKCupid.com. True, it’s ostensibly a dating website, but there’s such a thin line between friends and more than friends, it seems as good a place as any. It’s full of guys I like and who are like me, plus as an added benefit it’s one of those reputable dating sites where you won’t see someone’s junk before learning their name.