“As long as you’re discussing interesting studies, might we get your thoughts on this little gem related the female enthusiasm for sex to red wine consumption. Also, what is the Female Sexual Function Index?”

Much like I’d gratefully smile at a relative who changes the subject to the weather at an awkward Thanksgiving dinner where I grow weary of trying to explain to Grandma why it’s not ok the Mexican neighbors as “Spanish people,” I’m glad you brought this up.

Not only is the study itself a fascinating bit of sex research, it’s also a perfect exemplar of the phenomenon of mainstream media doing a piss poor job of reporting sex research.

Some Italian scientists, looking for trouble, gave the Female Sexual Functional Index (a self-report survey on arousal and satisfaction which you can read here) to 800 women between the ages of 18 and 50 who came into a Tuscan hospital. They divided the ladies into three categories: red wine drinkers, non drinkers and those who prefer other alcohol and excluded the results of everyone who drank more than 2 glasses a day, those who smoked and those with specific sexual dysfunctions.

What they discovered is that women who drank one or two glasses of red wine a day scored a little higher on the Index. All we know for certain is that in this particular group (which may or may not be representative of all women) those who drank a little bit of red wine reported having better sex lives. That’s it. That’s all this study proves. It doesn’t prove wine makes women hornier, it doesn’t prove women who drink have better sex, it doesn’t prove that wine will help your sex life.

But the media reporting the story was more than happy to make ridiculous leaps of logic for the sake of having tantalizing leads. One story started, “If you’ve always thought booze made sex more enjoyable, science may have finally agreed with you,” despite the fact the study said nothing of the sort. Others made inferences that people should drink on the way to the bedroom or that wine might be the key to a better sex life.

And nearly all the articles included either a picture of a glass of wine or a photo of a white couple in bed, the woman wearing a bra and the man topless, drinking white wine. Yet, the study actually only looked into red wine. Not a big deal in and of itself, of course, but a great example of how you can’t take mainstream media reports of scientific findings at face value.

To further examine the study and reasons why you shouldn’t immediately go to Wine and Spirits with the plan of saving your marriage, here is Timaree’s Methodological Problems O’Rama:

• Women who drink one to two glasses a day of red wine might also eat a diet that encourages cardiovascular health and live less stressful lives than those who drink a lot more or none at all, both factors that might contribute to sexual satisfaction. And they might also be relaxed about sexuality in general.
• Self report of sexual satisfaction is not proof of sex being better.
• The study was performed in Italy, a country known for its wine production. The possibilities for both skewed samples and conflicts of interests abound.
• There is no way to know whether the wine has an effect on sex drive or if women with higher sex drives tend to like wine.
• Older women scored higher on the index than young ones, indicating that satisfaction with sex might be more a function of natural or developed sexual peaks than the effect of alcohol

The list can continue on for a hot minute. In any event, the take-home message is that sexuality is complex and the media wants to simplify things to the point of worthlessness… so don’t base your decisions on cheesy news bits. And if you want to bang an Italian woman, get her lightly toasted.

Questions? Comments? Violent Reactions? Email sexwithtimaree@gmail.com See more at SexwithTimaree.com
Sexpert Timaree Schmit is currently finishing her doctorate in Human Sexuality, the culmination of a lifetime of prurient interests. She has worked as a sex educator writing for both academic and popular media for over seven years, and as an HIV Prevention Counselor, peer sexuality educator and adjunct professor. She was the founding Chair of the Human Sexuality Education Student Organization (HSEDSO) and is an active member of the American Association of Sexuality Educators, Counselors and Therapists (AASECT) and the Society for Scientific Study of Sexuality (SSSS). You can see more of her work at SexWithTimaree.com