I’m nervous to admit that my journey in procuring and eventually starting PrEP started by watching “Looking.” I fear that you are already judging me… Sticking me into a predisposed category of gay that is jumping on the Truvada/ PrEP bandwagon in its infancy to obtain some sort of social status. I hate to burst the bubble your potentially creating, but my decision to start PrEP came long after I was exposed to the idea via “Looking.” You’re about to embark on that journey with me. Grab a vodka cranberry, this could get messy.

 

It started like any other Sunday, my boyfriend and I passed a bowl (of ice cream) back and fourth and settled down for our Sunday night routine of “Looking,” “Girls,” and “Togetherness.” “Looking” started and I was disappointed that HBO had no warning of “nudity” or “strong sexual content” prior to the evening’s episode, but I knew I wasn’t going to turn it off. At this point I was too invested in the connections between characters to just watch it for the sex, more specifically, I was fascinated by the relationship developing between an HIV positive and an HIV negative character. I’ve been a homo for 16 years now, and I know full well the risks associated with HIV. I also understand there is, in my opinion, a shitty stigma surrounding HIV positive men, particularly by their HIV negative counterparts. The words “clean” vs. “dirty” bothered me before mainstream media pointed out it might be wrong to call an HIV positive man dirty and a negative man clean, but I’ve digressed from MY PrEP story. 

 

The particular relationship in Looking spurred a conversation between my couch partner and I. 

“Could you date an positive guy?” I questioned.

He replied, “Is there something you have to tell me?”

“Oh, no, I’m just curious,” I quickly answered. 

“I want to say yes, but honestly, probably not” He said as he went to re-fill the bowl.

 

I hadn’t answered my own question, I thought about it internally and decided if I loved a man enough, his status wouldn’t bother me. With the advances in modern medicine, it’s not a death sentence for him, or a guarantee of contraction for me. But what are those advances in modern medicine? Sure I had heard the words “Truvada” and “PrEP” before, but I knew almost nothing about them. 

 

I started my research and for the brevity of this initial column I’ll condense what I learned over a two week stretch into a few bullet points:

• Truvada/ PrEp works by blocking an enzyme called HIV reverse transcriptase. By blocking this enzyme, it prevents HIV from making more copies of itself in the body.

• PrEP has been in studies for over 10 years, and has been FDA Approved for 4 years 

• When starting PrEP, it takes at least seven days to reach high levels of protection against HIV.

• When stopping PrEP, individuals should continue using PrEP for four weeks after the last significant exposure.

• PrEP does not protect against other sexually transmitted infections (STI) or pregnancy. YOU STILL NEED TO USE A CONDOM! It is not a cure for HIV.

• When taken regularly, Truvada/ PrEP are 99% effective. 

• Side effects: headaches, nausea, and potentially weight loss. All side effects experienced by less than 10% of users. 

 

The last bullet point was the one that sold me; the lack of major side effects. If I have to tolerate a headache here and there, to ensure a longer and healthy life then why not? So I had made my decision, and while my manfriend didn’t have a real say in the matter, I felt it necessary to inform him of my decision. I was surprised that his reaction wasn’t as pro as I had thought…

“What do you mean you want to start PrEP, you’re dating me, and you’re not at risk?!” his tempered flared rather quickly.

“I just think it’d be a good back up incase ANYTHING were to happen… a fuck up, a needle prick, blood to blood contact during an emergency situation, a threesome gone wrong… what if we break up? Honestly, the possibilities are endless”

“Whatever, your life, your decisions, I just think it’s sketchy…”

“I’m not looking to use this as a means for bareback sex, I just want that extra layer of protection.” I retorted as I walked away. 

 

So the decision had been made, much to the dismay of my boyfriend. I was hell bent on starting PrEp, so I called the number I had found during my research for YHep, and made an appointment for the following week. 

Look for the next article “A Trip to YHep for PrEp”