BOYFRIEND UNIVERSITY: The Jesus-Boyfriend Disorder

There is a common, immature fantasy about relationships that reduces love down to dependency and assumes our insatiable neediness. Many of us love this fantasy and in fact are quite addicted to it. I like to call it the Knight-in-shining-armor syndrome or the Jesus-boyfriend disorder. We pretend there is one, unique, and perfectly looking person destined by divine graces who will finally love us rightly, so then we can feel whole and complete forever. (Insert sounds of angelic choir here.) Think of it as Jesus meets Cinderella. By definition, it’s about relationship as savior and assumes we all need saving.