9 Crazy Gayz at a Table

Executive Director of PhillyGayCalendar

Remember when  Michele from Romey and Michele’s High School Reunion, said “Let’s Fold Scarves!”  That’s how this whole evening started.  One gay saying, “Let’s go to dinner.”  8 other’s said, “OK.”  An undetermined amount of time later after: showers, plucking, tweezing, moisturizing, primping, and accessorizing, 9 gayz were headed to dinner.

But where to eat?

Marching “maryily” along the boardwalk, the chorus of gayz sounded their thought on the eateries.  “I don’t like Mexican.”  “This one’s too expensive.”  “Let’s go to the Oyster Festival!”  …. wait, what?  How did a bisexual work their way into our group?

We paraded along and eventually invaded the downtown area,  settling on Old Man Rafferty’s, I think a majority of the group were into daddies and just liked the sound of the name.

As our group roared into Raffertey’s , your’s truly approached the team of hostesses and asked if they were able take a table of 9 at 7pm with no reservation on a Saturday night – DON’T SAY IT!  I was already thinking I must be an asshole to ask the question!  However, through some miracle they decided to rearrange a part of the restaurant to accomodate us.  Meanwhile, my group of gayz began to act a fool up in der!   3 of the spied the dessert case and began to drool, “I’d love to eat that.  Another 2 spied a hot waiter and began to drool, “I’d love to eat that!” and a 2 spied the menu and began to get pissy, “I don’t want to eat that!”  The hostess seated 7 of us at a newly assembled  table.  Somehow in all the drama, we lost two gayz who just didn’t want to eat with us.  After a flurry of text messages, two more fell away from our flock.  Leaving 5 of us setting at a table for 10.


I was mortified when I told the waitress that we were only 5 now.   I was prepared to get the ONLY serving of attitude.   NOPE! She was so sweet, “No problem, let’s move you over to this smaller table and get you some dinner.”  This politeness was shocking to me because I live in Philly (ie.  i’m not angry i’m from philly t-shirts).  The waitress had a “how can I help you, no request is too much” attitude the whole night.  I loved her, in fact we all loved her.

Raffertey’s was a great joint.  The best thing we ate was the buffalo chicken spring rolls:  chicken, blue cheese,  julienned  carrots and celery in a wonton wrap served with buffalo sauce for dipping. STUPID GOOD!

The dessert, I don’t know the name, I asked the waitress if we could get a dessert that was obnoxious and needed to have chocolate and cheesecake in the name.  She gave us a double layer cheesecake with ganache in between the layers and on top!  One gay with a newly defined 6 pack, had 3 bites.  I was overcome with emotion to witness this…. I mean for a 6 pack wielding gay man to risk bloating….. that had to be a good cake!

Several of my gayz made friends with other waitresses in the restaurant to get the scoop on the aforementioned waiter – the boyz were sad to find out he was straight.  Sorry gayz, you ate your cake, you can’t have it too!

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