Chante: This week on RuPaul’s Drag Race, the queens practiced their lip-syncing skills, and paid homage to queens of seasons past.

Sashay: Yes girl, and the queens were clique-ing this week. Roxxxy, Alaska, and Detox combined forces to create Ro-Laska-Tox, undoubtedly a snarky drag queen team of insatiable bottoms.

Chante: Yes this threesome is fierce, however, Ro-Laska-Tox ain’t got nothin on the Heathers.

Sashay: Well then Chante, who do you think will be this season’s boogers?

Chante: The boogers: Serena Cha Cha (peaced out already), Monica Beverly Hillz and Coco Montrese. Does this make me racist?

Sashay: Yes. I, on the other hand, would also like to throw in Jade Jolie. She has booger written all over her snotface. I agree with Serena and Monica, but I think Coco may be a force to be reckoned with. Her lip-syncing was as fierce as her dominatrix outfit.

Chante: Well, Coco may have served up fierce LaShawn Beyond, however, Lineysha killed it with her Tyra Sanchez MANnerisms.

Sashay: Yes, Lineysha is gorge. I definitely enjoyed this new challenge. However, I think a lot of the girls could have exaggerated their portrayals a little more. The previous seasons’ queens reek of over the top character. A lot of the queens fell as flat as Serena’s chest.

Chante: Can we talk about Monica Beverly Hillz and her big reveal? I mean, talk about random yet obvious admission.

Sashay: Damn. Apparently Chante is serving up bitch realness today.

Chante: Yes girl, true banchee.

Sashay: It was heart wrenching. Can we move on? What the fuck is wrong with Junkx Monsoon? The most interesting thing about this bitch is her narcolepsy, which I think she is faking. Take a bump girl and wake the fuck up. You got a head of frizzy hair to do.

Chante: Ooooooo no she betta don’t! Hugs, not drugs girl.

Sashay: Three words… HOT OIL TREATMENT. Bitch grab a wig and cover that shit. I’m tired of her Boy George looking ass.

Chante: Listen, somebody needs to help Alyssa Edwards sissy dat walk. She stomps about that stage like a horse.

Sashay: Well, she has the face to match.

Chante: I said it before and I’ll say it again…somebody call Miss J!

Sashay: Please, I don’t think even Miss J could help this Clydesdale.

Chante: So girl…thoughts about the winner and loser?

Sashay: Love Lineysha and as we predicted last week, it was time for Serena Cha Cha to put lipstick to the mirror. I don’t know why the bitch even bothered unpacking.

Chante: She can take her book reading ass back to Panama.

Sashay: Yes, real queens read without any books

Chante: Ooop! You said it!

Sashay: Can I get an amen?

Chante: Amen!

P.S. Drag Racers – If you haven’t seen it yet, check out Willam, Detox, and Vicky Vox’s performance of Boy is a Bottom. It will have you gagging!