CHANGE For 2014

Executive Director of PhillyGayCalendar


This year I learned a very valuable lesson, and I would like to share it with you as we bring 2013 to a close.

You can’t change people.

Listen carefully because I’m going to say it again. And this time I want you to let it marinate for a few moments before I launch into my explanation.

Ready? Here goes.

You. Can’t. Change. People.

You can have the brightest hopes for somebody and see the potential within them to be greater than what they are but if they don’t see it then there’s no point in trying to make them into what you think they should be because…

You can’t change people.

You can inform someone you truly care about of an opportunity that would set his or her life on a different course. But if they’re not open to the opportunity you can’t be mad at them because…

You can’t change people.

You could spend an entire year chasing after someone who has told you on numerous occasions “I’m not interested,” and though sometimes that’s just a line that the Hard-To-Get like to throw out to remain aloof and elusive it isn’t hard to tell when someone is giving you a hard “No.”  Continuing to pursue them is asinine because…

You can’t change people.

But you can change yourself.

Because when you try to change a person who isn’t receptive or ready for it, you’re the one who becomes frustrated while they continue on with their lives never knowing how upset their behavior makes you. And honestly, they’ll never know the agony you put yourself through because it doesn’t directly affect them.

As we bid farewell to 2013, which has personally been a roller coaster ride of a year, I wanted to take this opportunity to impart a bit of knowledge with you to start your year off right. The time you’ve spent putting your best efforts forward at bettering someone else’s life is futile if they’re not willing to listen. So cheers to those whom you tried to help in 2013, and double cheers to YOU for taking all of that energy and applying it to making yourself better in 2014 and beyond.

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