Calling all Basic Racers! This week, our queens showed off their tight snatch…GAME!

Sashay: Well hunty, what did you think of this snatch? Was it a good snatch or a stinky snatch?

Chante: Snatch Game is, by far, my favorite part of every season. This time around, I’d have to say I was equally pleased and disappointed with the queens’ snatch.

Sashay: I can’t help but enjoy the snatch as well, but some queens had me wishing i’d never see a snatch again in my life! Speaking of fishy snatches, was anyone surprised to see Gia Gunn go?

Chante: Ding dong the bitch is dead! Felicia has left the building. The only thing that would’ve made me happier is if Ru would’ve sent Laganja packing as well.

Sashay: We’ll get to that whacko in a minute. Gia Gunn, I loved you from your head to your hairline. People actually pay to see you perform? Then she’s going to say, “This is some bullshit.” No bitch, the bullshit was you thinking you could do Selena for Snatch Game. How disrespectful.

Chante: And she somehow managed to ruin Kim Kardashian! I mean, I know both of them ain’t got a bit of personality, but bitch came out lookin’ like a frumpy Kim K! Like, what da what?

Sashay: Trust! Kimmy would never wear that atrocious ensemble. Everyone knows Kim is all about black and white. I’m sorry ya’ll, but I need to go in on Gia Gunn now that’s she’s done. She had no charisma, uniqueness, nerve, or talent. She tryin’ to say, “You guys are all still DUDES”. Well bitch, you a dude too until you get that surgery.

Chante: Tell me how you really feel, girl! Now getting back to Miss Estranja…girlfriend has apparently never actually watched an episode of the Rachel Zoe Project.

Sashay: And apparently neither have any of the voices in her head. Seriously, what is this bitch on? She’s making up drama, getting mad at other queens, but then can’t remember why she’s mad at them. Doesn’t Ru let these girls bring their anti-psychotic meds with them or what? Laganja I’d like to Es-strangle-ya.

Chante: She won’t last much longer…and I also predict that neither will Milk. I will just never get these queens that think showing up in boy drag is gonna get them points.

Sashay: And was it just me, or was Milk’s Ru-inspired look offensive? Like, did he really have to draw those dots on his face? Plus his bald cap wasn’t cutting it. I feel like he’s wasting everyone’s time. His Juila Child was childish.

Chante: But you know who’s snatch was on point last night??? Miss DeLaCreme! She was on point all night long. Her Downton Maggie Smith and runway looks were perfection. That second win was well deserved! “Can you imagine…vodka infused with CITRUS!”

Sashay: Yes girl, I told you that she is one to keep an eye on. And as much as I can’t stand the Mouthbreather for leaving her mouth open all the livelong day like she’s waiting for someone to put a dick in it, her Anna Nicole Smith was entertaining.

Chante: Adore was serving it…her spook was unclockable. And I’ll give props to Bianca Del Rio. Her Judge Judy was pretty spot on.

Sashay: However the funniest moment came from Trinity K. Bonet, not as Nicki Minaj, but as herself when she thought Beyonce had sent her a video. In your dreams girl.

Chante: Trinity was a bore this week, and as for the rest of the bunch, they did not catch Chante’s eye either. Joslyn’s Teresa Guidice…Darienne’s Paula Deen…Courtney’s Fran Dresher…all big yawns.

Sashay: Agreed. Now for the controversy. For those of you who watched Untucked!, do you think Santino was throwing shade at Trinity for her dentures?

Chante: Ru said he was teasing her…not Trinity. Miss Bonet needs to take them busted teeth and get over herself.

Sashay: Well, I think if Ru had been in drag when she defended herself and Santino, I would have believed her, but out of drag… I don’t know. My momma told me never to trust a man. Can I get an Amen?

Chante: AMEN!