This week on RuPaul’s Drag Race, the girls were challenged to design a gay pride float with a message… and a fabulous ensemble to go with it!

Chante: Let’s begin with the titi challenge…I mean mini challenge. There were some hot messes up on that stage…Jiggly being suspect #1.

Sashay: Phi Phi was certainly taken down a nip or two when her damn tits flew off and her wig hit the floor.

Chante: She needed to be put in check anyway. And as much as I am not hot for Willam, not only did she kill the mini challenge, but she pummeled the runway.

Sashay: But was it really necessary for Logo to censor and blur the fake tits?

Chante: I know…ridic.

Sashay: Moving on. I loved the concept for this week’s challenge… too bad the queens failed.

Chante: Well…not ALL of them failed. But let’s go ahead and open la biblioteca.

Sashay: RuPaul – you are quickly becoming the queen I love to hate, minus the love. Number one, bitch you ain’t no fuckin Heidi Klum, so stop pretending this is Project Runway. You got the judging completely wrong. Willam’s float was all about himself just like Milan’s. In actuality, Jiggly was one of the few queens who stuck to the challenge and had a message: ♥ U 4 U.

Chante: I’mma go ahead and disagree with you on that. Jiggly had no idea what her float was about and made it up on the fly. She looked like a bloated Oompa Loompa that needed to sail her ass off into the chocolate factory for another snack.

Sashay: Sail? More like roll her ass. I’ll agree with you on the latter. She looks atrocious…like all the time. However, the reason it took her so long to come up with an idea was because she was the only one who put any thought into it. Clearly, them other skanks just decorated their cardboard boats to match their dresses. What was Chad Michaels’ message, that he’s old? What was Dida’s message, that she’s tacky?

Chante: And what was Jiggly’s message? That she needs lessons from school children about how to use Elmer’s glue? Willam’s float may have been self serving, but her entire runway presentation was on point, hontey. On. Point.

Sashay: And that’s my point, this competition shouldn’t just be about looks, if it were, then the last three queens who won the competition wouldn’t have won. These heffas had an opportunity to speak to the CHILD-REN of America and had nothing to say. You have to have substance and some of these queens are just disappointing me week after mutha-fuckin week.

Chante: Well this entire season is just lack luster.

Sashay: The bottom two should have been Dida and Milan. Don’t wear a t-shirt to a drag competition and make sure your boat is about something other than yourself.

Chante: Oh I couldn’t disagree more. The bottom two should’ve both gone home weeks ago. But we know how I feel about Jiggly Caliente. She can do no right in my eyes…mostly because she hurts my eyes.

Sashay: You ain’t lying, but I will say she makes a slightly better looking woman than a man. Girl, without her wig she looks like she should be ringing bells in some old tower.

Chante: Quasimoto much?

Sashay: Halleloo. I enjoy Willam’s sense of humor, but I don’t think he deserved to win this challenge. How does he get away with not making his own clothes?

Chante: Let’s just be real…Willam’s a bitch…and not the good kind. All in all, though, I am still rooting for Sharon, Chad and Latrice. Have your favorites changed as we near the top 5?

Sashay: I think I am rooting for Latrice at this point. That girl holds her own every time. I think Chad really needs to step it up if she wants to stay in this competition. However, I would not underestimate Willam. I think he has the potential to make it to the final three.

Chante: Well, we shall see what develops shant we? Can I get an Amen up in here?

Sashay: Amen!